you all know how wily i am. any way to stick it to the man, get cheaper prices, unethically win shit...i'm not above doing any of it because we chinese are wily and know how to survive and by survive, i mean cheat the system.
however, in doing so, i've sort of turned myself into a racist against my own kind. here are 5 ways that my wilyness has backfired on me:
1// i don't believe anything chinese people say. organic? authentic? LIES. i don't even go to a chinese acupuncturist which is like, the medicine of my people because i think they won't do it right or they're going to trick me and do some other shit to me. so my traditional chinese doctor is a white lady whom i trust completely.
2// i always think chinese people are trying to rip me off. i really dont know why but every time i walk into a chinese mall or grocery store or anything owned by my people, when they boast about magical herbs or authentic bags or real gold, i think they're just trying to get my money and all that shit is fake. but for serious, how can i not think like that WHEN THE MOTHERLAND IS KNOWN FOR BOOT-LEGGING ERRTING IN LIFE??
see what i mean?!? and hahahahaha!
3// because i’m so wily, i automatically assume that others are wily too. and therefore, are trying to cheat me. which is what wily folks do, duh. see #2.
4// i think anything made by chinese peeps are cheaply made. our motto:spend the least amount of money to make the most money. this stems back from us always needing to get the most bang for our buck and therefore, cutting corners when making shit is our thing.
5// i refuse to pay full price for shit at chinese stores. (or any store for that matter). why bother? their prices are all pretend anyway and guess what, bitches? we're known for our haggling skillz so those prices you see at those chinese stores? we call them "white man prices" because tourists tend to just pay whatever is the asking price which makes us chinafolks laugh. here's some advice: you can talk down any chinaman from a regular price if you threaten to go to his competitor.
damn, this should be a confession post because these are horrible things i'm saying about my peoples.
please tell me i'm not alone in this way of thinking...how has your wilyness backfired on you?